This Kiss
by xbamxheartagramx
Summary: Humans always overcomplicate things and Venom isn't playing games when it comes to loving his host. Symbrock, Veddie, Eddie/Venom, gender-fluid venom, he/she pronouns (and they pronouns bc I can't figure my English out, man) rated for the future. I'll be updating the final chapter pretty soon. Also on Ao3!
1. This Kiss

A/N: There aren't enough gender-fluid Ven fics so I had to do one. Possibly some smut later bc I'm a fiend.

Venom/Eddie, femVen, gender-fluid venom, he/she pronouns, kissing, boners, rated m for nuances really, shameless symbiote tiddies bc hot, it's been so long since I seen tiddies other than my own, now I'm just rambling, this isn't AoA, I'm lost

If Eddie has learned anything during his time with an alien lifeform it's that they are increasingly _needy_. All hours of the day and night Venom whispers to him. Hungry, bored, begging for attention. _Incessant_.

Take now for instance. Eddie is at his desk typing, _working_. And there's Venom tracing a lazy trail down his temple with his sopping wet tongue.

"Could you stop licking me for like five minutes, dude?" Venom ignores him, lathing the curve of his jaw and the hollow of his neck. It had been weird at first, Eddie hadn't expected the Klyntar to be so affectionate. Even though they are always connected Venom can't seem to help himself. At home he manifests himself, sometimes just a head or hands, sometimes a full upper body, sometimes his entire being, tendrils ghosting between them, the constant connection. In public he tries to be calmer, reign himself in, but there's always a tendril wrapped around his hosts arm or thigh under his clothes. On particularly needy days his entire torso is criss crossed by blackness. Eddie sighs pushing Venoms head away gently. "Seriously. I need to finish this today."

 **Bored, Eddie. Work is boring.**

"It's work man, I dunno what to tell ya." Venom snorts and nuzzles the underside of Eddie's chin.

 **Work is different on this planet. Before it was bind, conquer, feed. Now we work.**

Eddie tries not to think too hard about that. Venom's past is still uncharted territory. He knows there have been others, of course there had been, Venom is ancient by human standards. It still makes him uncomfortable and maybe a little jealous. Knowing that his other had been so intimate with others makes his belly hot.

 **None of them were _you_.**

Venom presses against their internal barrier, urging Eddie to let him share something. Eddie growls, much to his counterparts delight, and pushes away from the desk. Boundaries had been a struggle. In the beginning Venom passed between their conscious unbidden, sifting through memories and knowledge, dissecting Eddie from the inside. It had left him panicky and paranoid. The alien, while naive to humanity, understood this and they had reached an agreement about asking permission. Though neither could help how much they felt one another. Small victories, right?

Eddie drops into the couch, cushions deflating under his weight. Venom is all around him the moment they're seated. Head rising from Eddie's chest, opalescent eyes watching him, tendrils of heat coil about his arms and chest like a hug. It's comforting in their own odd way.

 _Show me_.

And Venom does. Six hundred thousand years of existence, countless worlds and hosts, each more abstract than the last. As the memories pass through him an understanding settles like a rock in his stomach. He starts to voice it, feels like it needs to be said, but there's so many connotations he doesn't understand.

 **We have no secrets.** Venom chimes helpfully, urging him to speak.

"You've never been bonded before." Venoms head bobs before him, inky black coalescing to form a neck, shoulders, torso, arms. He knows Eddie likes this, the physicality sating some primal need to have another body near his. Venom is more than happy to oblige.

 **"We share many firsts, Eddie."** The alien cups Eddie's face, unblinking eyes staring into his others. Eddie shifts, the gaze is always a little unnerving. His hands are nervous, hesitant as they settle on Venoms forearms. He isn't used to touching the symbiote like this, feeling him solid beneath his hands. It isn't bad, just different.

"Why?" He doesn't mean to whisper, doesn't mean to make the moment more intimate, but it happens regardless.

 **"They weren't perfect."** Hot breath ghosts over Eddie's face and he hopes the other doesn't notice him shiver though he knows he does. He notices everything about his host. Including how the word perfect makes his heart do somersaults.

Another memory, this one shared between them. The forest outside the Life Foundation. The sight of Venom on Anne, curves and muscle and _woah_. Then the kiss, intense to ends Eddie still can't process.

 **"You liked me like that. Like Anne."** Venom pulls back, clawed fingers sliding across Eddie's shoulders.

 _Oh no, no, no, no._

"I...uhm…well see...that was…" Eddie sputters. He tries to say it was Anne, but they both know it's a lie as soon as the thought crosses his mind. He lays a hand over his eyes and sighs instead. "Geez dude. I don't know how to talk about this."

 **"You overcomplicate things."** Eddie's head shoots up at the change in his others voice. Light, musical, _feminine_. Weight shifts as Venom manifests a full, very female body in Eddies lap. The human can't help himself, eyes roaming across Venoms cleavage and waist. It's been a long time since he's been this close to a woman and his body knows it.

 _Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit!_

Venom leans closer, breasts pressing against Eddie's chest suggestively and his hands grab her hips in reflex. "Vee...I...this." He tries really _really_ hard not to grind upwards, Lord knows he wants to, but it just doesn't feel right. It's too soon, this is too new.

 **"Shhh...Eddie. It's just a kiss."** Venom closes the distance, pressing their faces together softly. Its different this time, calmer, slower. Venom's tongue traces his lips. When he opens up to her she takes her time exploring him, holding his face between her hands while tendrils curl about his limbs tightly.

 _Right, just a kiss._

They both know it's a lie as a soon as the thought crosses his mind, but they ignore it tonight. Tonight it's just them and this kiss.

A/N: FemVen woke my inner deviant. Shout out to to whoever decided we needed that scene. Also, where I can I get my own symbiote? I need it. Leave a review and let me know I'm relevant!


	2. Processing Time

A/N: I've been neglecting this site in favoelr of Ao3 and i do apologize to my followers here. I'll be posting more of my work this week ao stay with me loyal followers!

This chapter is mostly dialogue and character development.

The first time Venom said that they loved him Eddie choked on a bagel. He spent a few minutes gagging and attempting to gulp down water until it finally dislodged and he could gasp in precious oxygen. Venom did absolutely _nothing_ to aid him, only reassuring him later that they knew he wasn't in any danger and could fend for himself.

"You...what? Do you know what that means?" Venom had glared at him, opal eyes barely slits in their dark face.

 **"I said what I said."**

Eddie didn't think that was a sufficient answer and he could only bring himself to pat the symbiote on the head affectionately in return. It was too much to take in at once. He still hadn't wrapped his head around the Life Foundation fiasco. Becoming a host, Venom almost dying, him _actually_ dying, the way Venoms presence made him feel, the kisses. Not to mention the rest of his piss poor, messy past. How could he love Venom when he couldn't even love himself? He had failed in every relationship he ever had. Venom assured him they had time. They would wait. It was almost unbearable.

Eddie tries not to think about it all. Eyes wide open staring at his phone, 2:02 am. He's pretending to do research, pretending to look into Cletus Kasady, but he's staring blindly ahead lost in thought.

 ** _Eddie_**

He shivers as Venoms voice rolls through his conscious. At first he ignores it, forcing himself to actually read the article he's had open for the last twenty minutes.

 **"Don't ignore me, Eddie."** Bed springs creak as the mattress suddenly becomes heavier. Eddie sighs and turns to face his other, corporeal from the waist up. Eddie hasn't figured out of they just don't like legs or if his other is a little lazy, but most of the parts he likes are present at least. He's taken to the form most similar to Eddie's own, broad shoulders leading down to a muscled torso and slightly tapered waist. He pretends the shiver that goes up his spine is due to the chill of the room and pulls the covers closer.

A clawed hand finds his cheek and strokes his jawline gently. Despite his apprehension, Eddie's eyes flutter shut and he leans into the touch. "I'm sorry, babe. This is just uncharted territory." _And it scares me._ He tries to bury that thought and the panic that rises with it, but even if Venom didn't hear that he certainly felt it.

 **"Don't be afraid, Eddie."** They bump foreheads gently. **"Would never hurt you."** This kiss is soft and light like a butterfly. There's no intent, no pressure, just _them_ in this moment together. Eddie presses back harder, one hand cupping the cool skin of Venoms jaw. Venom reciprocates, taloned hands landing on his shoulders to bring them closer together. They stay like that for a few minutes, sharing kisses and exploring each other with curious hands.

Eddie'd be a damn liar if he said he doesn't like the way Venom's form dwarfs his own. There's something undeniably hot about the inane sense of danger that reeks from his other at all times. The hulking size in any of their forms only driving that predatory nature home. **"Do you want me? Us?"** It's such an odd question, an important one, but so strange to hear from the creature he'd essentially eaten people with.

"Yes…" It's barely a whisper and Eddie isn't sure he actually forms the word, but _someone_ said it and Venom doesn't seem alarmed so it must be him. "Ven, I've never...uhm...you see…" He stutters and stumbles, feeling more of Venoms inky tendrils twist around his limbs and waist, pulling them closer until he's half consumed by an amorphous embrace. Venoms still there, laying in a puddle of himself, which has Eddie's sense of physics reeling.

"Look, I sort of fuck up every relationship I'm in somehow. And this so much more than two people doing what people do, you know?" The words pour out of his mouth and he briefly wonders if Venoms messing with his inhibitors or if he's really just this into his symbiote and missed it. "Saying you love someone romantically is a different level of love. Being in love, it's just...it's different." Venoms gaze turns upward in thought and he rests his head in a clawed palm almost comically.

 **"The feelings you had for Anne. Those were romantic, yes? In love?"** Venoms staring him down now, intense and concentrated on the answer. It makes Eddie swallow and he's immediately concerned about where these questions will lead.

"Well, we were engaged so yeah. I was in love with her for a long time." Eddie sighs, turning on his back and rubbing at his chest in agitation. "That's why it was so hard to let go." It doesn't hurt the same way, doesn't leave him so hollow, but there's a dull ache when he thinks of her. A quiet 'what if' in the back of his mind.

 **"You have those some feelings for me, do you not?"** Eddie sputters as heat rises up his neck and across his cheeks. He wants to deny it. There's something wrong about falling in love with your alien parasite. Right? Venom huffs and nuzzles Eddies cheek **. "Eventually you will have to stop comparing us to humans, darling. What we have is more."** And it is more. So very much more. More to lose when he inevitably does something selfish and stupid.

Eddie stares a hole through his bedroom ceiling, bubbles of fear rising in his gut. Venoms breath ghosts over his neck, warm and damp and maybe more comfortable than he wants to admit. For a while they don't say anything. Venom holds him and nuzzles his jaw and waits patiently for his host to work through the inner turmoil drifting at the edges of their bond.

"I-I'm sorry, V." He finally speaks, his voice breaks and a tear leaks out before he can rub it away. "I wish I was better at...anything. You kind of drew the short straw with me, bud."

Venom huffs, breath raising goosebumps across his the humans flesh. **"Wouldn't be here if I didn't want to be, Eddie."** Venom squeezes around his host in a tight hug. **"I can fill all of your empty spaces. There's nowhere I can't reach."** The statement is possessive and raw and entirely gut wrenching. Eddie's stomach falls to his knees and his breaths are taking more effort again. Venom holds him tighter, noting the way Eddie's brain releases serotonin in greater volume the longer they embrace.

The alien melts for a moment, pooling beneath his host before rematerializing so Eddie is laying against him back to chest. Arms and tentacles twine around his body, holding him against the heat of his other. **"It's okay, Eddie. I am here. We are here."** Eddie grips Venoms arm against him, trying to calm himself as Venom adjusts to his unspoken needs. It takes a few minutes, but eventually Eddie's heart rate returns to normal ranges he stops hyperventilating.

"Venom?" His voice seems to echo in the small apartment even though he's whispering. His other lets out a small grunt in response, rubbing his cheek against the top of Eddie's head. "Thanks for you know...everything."

 **"I love you, Eddie."**

 _I love you too._ He can't quite say it out loud yet, but by the way Venom holds him closer he heard it just the same.

After a week of grueling footwork Eddie just wants to unwind. Leads have been chased, calls have been made, drafts have been sent, his symbiote has been fed. Eddie is nearly giddy at the prospect of doing absolutely nothing for the rest of the night. He falls into the couch, careful not to spill any of the popcorn he'd prepared.

"What'll tickle the pickle tonight, V?" He flips through the Netflix menu, scrolling past the originals he's already seen and the nature documentaries Venom has been obsessed with lately. A tendril snakes out of his ribs, deftly swiping a piece of popcorn and tapping it against Eddies lips. He takes it absently, not noticing how the tendril vibrates as he lips brush it. His hand stops in the romance section, some title catching the eye of his other.

 **That one, Eddie.**

"Oh," Eddie's mouth runs a little dry, "maybe I should have seen this one coming, huh?" Of course his other would choose The Shape of Water. Venom chuckles, his face materializing before Eddie's. The grin is basically shit eating and Eddie rolls his eyes.

 **Humanity has such an interest in relations with other species. Much of your entertainment is 'science fiction' mixed with 'romance'.**

Eddie doesn't have an argument for that because well, the alien ain't wrong. "Let's just watch the lady bone the fish guy, okay?" Venom thrums with anticipation, turning to watch and thankfully not pushing the issue further. He's in Eddie's head, he knows all the fantasies he's ever had. And let's just say, the guy had a thing for aliens long before Venom was a part of his life.

The movie is better than Eddie expects and for once they're both quiet, eyes drawn to the screen. At some point the female lead breaks her aquatic lover out of his prison and they make a run for it. Venom preens, turning his gaze to Eddie and studying him. "What is it?" Eddie raises an eyebrow after a moment of being stared down.

 **"They are like us. You found me, saved me. And we became more."** Eddie swallows hard. It isn't untrue, that did happen, but the equation still makes his stomach twist.

"Well, sort of, yeah."

Then it's the shower scene and Eddie feels his face go hot. Venom doesn't miss a beat, noticing Eddie's embarrassment and turning back to the television instantly. They watch in silence, Eddie too conflicted to say much of anything and Venom watching with unabashed curiosity. He tries to ignore the tightness in his jeans.

 **"There are things like this on the internet."**

Eddie slaps his hands over his face and mumbles through his fingers. "Heavenly Father, if you're there, I'm sorry, okay? I'm sorry for everything. Please just end this."

 **"No reason to be ashamed, Eddie."**

 _Oh no. That voice._

He risks a peek between his fingers and sure enough Venoms materialized in her female form. She smiles widely, and leans back on her hands where she's seated on the coffee table. "You set me up."

 **"Only because you are so difficult. I'm not stupid, Eddie. I know what attraction in your species entails."**

Eddies mouth moves without making any sound for a few seconds. "Look V, it's just. It's complicated for me. The way I was raised…" He scratches the back of his head in agitation. "I was taught to be ashamed of myself and sexual desires. I mean, to most open minded people this would still be pretty high on the weird-as-fuck-o-meter."

 **"What do their opinions matter?"** Venoms head cocks sideways, both curious and a little annoyed with the runaround.

"It just does. Humans are complicated like that, V." Eddie sighs, one hand twirling one of the connecting tendrils flowing between their forms.

 **"But you want us."** This time she seems a little hurt. **"You desire us, you dream of us, you imagine us together when you think I'm not watching."** She looks down at her body in thought. **"Is this not what you want? I can be different."** Her body shimmers, feminine features lost as Venoms form shifts to wider shoulders and a flat chest.

"No!" Eddie nearly yells, grasping his others biceps. "No, V. Your body is perfect, whatever form you choose is fine. I'm not-it's not about gender." He forces himself to meet Venoms narrowed gaze.

 **"I cannot be human, Eddie. I can be many things for you, but I can't change what I am."** The words are carefully chosen and there's no hiding the pain behind them, but Venom tries not to let the rejection pass to his host. Regardless of whether their connection progresses beyond platonic barriers or not, Eddie is still his perfect host.

"I don't need human." Eddie's eyes are sad, nearly brimming with tears as he strokes down Venom's jawline. "I just need more time. I'm sorry, just a little longer, okay?" Venom looks annoyed, but he nods in agreement anyway.

 **"So long as you stop avoiding it, Eddie. You can't hold us in suspense forever."** Eddie only nods, wiping unshed tears away silently.

A/N: Look, Eddie has a lot of catholic guilt in my mind. He's agnsty. Theres sex next so its worth all the talk I swear. Leave some love!


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